I Promise Im Not Your Guidance Counselor

The word “bullying” gets judged as soon as it is heard.  Many thoughts come to mind when you first hear it, and if you’re anything like me you probably think of something along the lines of “corny guidance counselor”…but I promise you I am not your guidance counselor…corny however, I may be…no promises there.  I, among almost everyone else, have experience, and been a victim of bullying.  It is not something anyone should be ashamed of as it happens to so many people.  This is an issue that needs to be discussed, but so many people are afraid to speak out about it because they feel embarrassed about it…so let me break the ice.

Bullying came into effect when hormones did.  Around sixth grade is when it started for me.  A new school, new classmates, and many new opportunities.  I wanted to be popular so bad I thought I would have done anything to fit in.  I made some bad choices, such as choosing the “popular” friend over the true friend, and my priorities were all out of line…but hind sight is always twenty twenty and we all learn from our mistakes.  Im not proud of my choices, but I am honest about them.  In seventh grade is when my life drastically changed and I began filming The Naked Brothers Band movie.  I was so excited about the movie! I remember being so proud of myself and telling my “friends”.  I was dumbfounded when my friends reactions were mean and belittling instead of proud and supportive.  Long story short, these girls began to pick on me for everything, what I wore, my hair, my short height, how young I looked compared to them, my ethnicity…and the lowest blow of all…they made fun of me for not having a father.  I remember hating my life in middle school.  I would complain to my mom and all she could say was “Oh sweetie they are just jealous” but no person getting picked on wants to hear “they are just jealous”.  It feels like a lame excuse that doesn’t explain anything.  I came to realize that I didn’t really care what they said about me.  I was happy “doin mah thang” filming the movie, working hard to get good grades, and making friendships that still stand to this day.  I had made it through what I believed was the worst.

Wrong.

Transitioning from middle school to high school is like making the transition from your towns tween park and rec. softball team with the girls who are just there to have fun and play a game to playing on the high school softball team with the girls whos arms are double your size and their arms (which are the size of your legs) throw pitches that scare the life out of you.  High school scares the life out of you.  Everything comes a lot faster, stronger, and meaner, similar to the pitches these men dressed as girls are throwing.

I would say “I remember my first day of high school” but I can’t because I wasn’t there.  I was on set filming for the first season of NBB (Naked Brothers Band).  Great way to start my new high school…as a naked brother.  I knew no one either.  I arrive at school mid october and had a really great freshman year.  I made friends with almost everyone, even the upper class men, joined the JV cheer team, attended most of the  football and basket ball games, and made memories to last a life time.  Many people asked me why I didn’t make the choice to be home schooled like other child actors do, but I responded with the reasoning that I wanted to maintain a normal high school life.  I didn’t want to miss a thing.  Well I didn’t… especially not the bullying that comes with it.  I began getting bullied in my sophomore year.  It was this year that I got my first boyfriend.  I remember liking him so much!  I got criticized for not “doing anything” with him by the other girls who were “doing stuff” with their boyfriends.  They made fun of me that I wanted a boy “friend” who was my companion, someone to complain to, and  just someone I knew was going to call me before I went to bed.  I didn’t want anything physical because I wasn’t ready and I believe that teenagers rush into things these days.  At least some bullying was reasoned for.  I developed relationships with girls that didn’t care for me to say the least.  To be honest, I am not sure why.  I think it was maybe because I don’t smoke, drink, fool around with guys, and neglect my responsibilities in school.  It could also be that I was an actress, always missing school.  Again in high school I got made fun of for my ethnicity….let me repeat…in HIGH SCHOOL I got made fun of for my ethnicity.  Take a second to just listen to that.  In high school I expected everyone to be mature, but I was wrong.  I can understand making fun of me because I didn’t want to drink, or smoke, or have sex, or even that I was afraid to fail a test.  But to make fun of a person over something they cannot control is just trivial.  What did they expect me to say “Oh I’m sorry I’m a quarter korean…I promise on Monday I won’t be”.  Lets all grow up here.  Anyways, these girls antagonized me for the rest of my high school days at my private catholic school.  What irony that I met these girls at a catholic school.  You would think I would be upset, or jaded by them, but I honestly am not.  Through them I realized that I am a strong, determined, and powerful girl.  I love that I am made of a billion different heritages, I love that I am short, I love that I was on a TV show, I love that I stuck to my morals, I love that my mother wouldn’t be ashamed of anything I have ever done.  And most of all, I love how I dealt with bullying.

I rose above it.   didn’t get on their level and make fun of them back.  I didn’t take low blows at them.  I didn’t talk badly about them, spread rumors, or get all my friends involved in my problem, and for this I am truly proud.  I never thought I had it in me…but I did and so do all of you.

Bullying is serious.  It can lead to depression, TWLOHAself infliction and even suicide.  The company “To Write Love on Her Arms (TWLOHA) has been created to raise awareness of teen suicide and depression.  Did you know that bullying is a leading cause in teen suicide?  Don’t let yourself become a statistic.  If you are being bullied…REACH OUT!  It doesn’t have to be your parents, your guidance counselor, or anyone you think you should go to but dont want to.  You can talk about this issue with anyone you trust, it can be a friend, a cousin, an aunt…you can even come to me!  If you are being bullied YOU ARE NOT ALONE!  Everyone goes through it, but not everyone does something about it.  If we all speak up together we can put an end to bullying.

I promise you Im not your guidance counselor, but instead your friend.

Spread the Love.

Best,

A.

Advertisements

7 Comments »

  1. Hannah Said:

    this is AMAZING Allie,
    I relate to all your bulling posts on twitter and blogs and video’s,
    your amazing.

  2. Daisy Said:

    WOW this is touching..
    also with me I wanted to be popular..
    but you dont have to, you could be with yourself..like sometimes im always by myself with nobody bad around me..
    but everything that you said on this is really touching..
    just keep your head up high and dont listen on what they say because those type people judge when they dont even know who you really are, but you know what, you are one amazing person…
    YOU INSPIRE ME ALOT..!!!
    like i said i been through the same path you been on..”)

  3. amandarosex3 Said:

    wow im having difficulty writing this because im still in tears..i knew u were bullied but i didnt think they were that harsh and especially about ur ethnicity and father. that is just so hard for me to even think about. sadly enough i can def relate to a good portion of this and know a few people that decided not to get help and it ended in tragedy. only a week ago i was sitting in school off in a daze contemplating if you would be able to help me with the bullying in my life. most of the time it is done by my “best friend” to be totally honest. i love her dearly but she doesnt know where she crosses the line from being “just a joke” or an insult. she is just always putting me down and discouraging me with everything i do or say. i think this could be a reason why i am shy..because im afraid of not being accepted and flat out rejected. on the other-hand i can relate to the catholic school thing. my high school is very small with only 425 kids. im looked at differently because i dont drink, smoke, do drugs, and fool around with various guys every week. i got my first and second bf my sophomore yr and needless to say..i didnt go “far” with them. kinda why they broke up with me. but ok sorry for telling you my life story im done. as u can tell i can ramble on and on. thanks for writing about bullying. its a very important topic to all.
    god bless
    xoxo Amanda Rose

  4. vandalia1998 Said:

    I recently made a Video about Bullies

    To say I was picked on in Elementry and Middle school would be true. As you can tell from my videos on youtube I have and had back then a speach problem and never could talk very well. Plus I was too emotional and would let stuff efect me.

    But it wasn’t until Highschool sophmore year that I was really thrown for a loop.

    One day two classmates, up to this point who had shown every evedence of being friends decided to start a rumor that I was gay.

    I decided to ignor it and over the weekend the whole school was talking about it. and I felt alone and out of place. It reached it’s peak on Valentine Day 1996 when they sent me a Carnation from a guy to make people talk about it again.

    Everything I knew was crushed then and I begain my distrust of people which unfortionitly I still kind of have today.

    Once you’ve been burned by people who once said they were your friends its kind of hard to fully trust people again. But I try one day at a time

  5. Melissa Said:

    You are truly an amazing role model. thank you for being you!

  6. Miranda Said:

    Wow I am truly, truly moved by this entry that you are so willing to open up about something so personal and hurtful but that so many people go through. You are letting everyone who has gone through bullying or who is being bullied now that they are not alone. You are truly inspirational Allie DiMeco

  7. Nicole Said:

    The important thing is, you stayed true to yourself Allie. Being a bajillion races is great, I wish I was a little bit of everything just like you. And if those sluts want to make fun of you for not having you-know-what, then that’s their problem. And you being short? Well, big things come in small packages 😉
    God bless you for reaching out to teens who are going through the same things you are. You and Kris are such good role models. Keep rockin, and we’ll keep on rollin 🙂


{ RSS feed for comments on this post} · { TrackBack URI }

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: